It has been about a million years since I last hammered out a blog. “When will you write a new one?” shouted literally nobody.
Well you’re in luck. Here we go. I decided to take the summer off to “be more present” with the children, which mostly involved scouring Netflix to find something they would both agree on, but we’ll chalk that one up as a win and basically say I’m an excellent parent.
EldestGirl has recently turned seven. This seems improbable at best, but I checked the dates, and it’s definitely so.
For the last few years we’ve gone to local facilities like soft plays for birthday parties, and the whole experience has been fairly hands-off. This year, I foolishly thought it would be a brilliant idea (and so much cheaper) to do the party myself. It wasn’t cheaper. If anything it was a bit more expensive, and that’s before you factor in having to replace the curtains (don’t ask).
EldestGirl is a big reader, and having devoured every Roald Dahl book going over the last two years (I have hidden Tales of the Unexpected for now. I don’t need her getting any ideas about legs of lamb), we decided on a Roald Dahl birthday party.
I am the least arty-crafty-Pinteresty person in the world, so I did outsource quite a lot of the party. Externally done was:
- The golden ticket invitations
- The Matilda birthday cake
- The pass the parcel, which I bought fully-wrapped on eBay because bollocks am I wrapping the same shitty toy nine times.
The centrepiece was a Charlie-and-the-Chocolate-Factory chocolate fountain which I bought from Lakeland. Each time you use it, it takes £10 of chocolate, so I wasn’t going to test it in advance.
I probably should have tested it in advance.
On turning it on, plumes of black, acrid, electrical smoke billowed out. Still, it’s not a children’s party without a minor electrocution, is it? Lakeland were very good and provided a refund, and little Daisy’s eyebrows will probably grow back.
We also did a George’s Marvellous Medicine with some magic potion
Diet Coke and magic pills Mentos. We did musical bumps to the Matilda soundtrack. We served “Frobscottle” (coloured lemonade decanted into a glass bottle) and “snozzcumbers” (cucumbers).
So how would I rate the Roald Dahl birthday party? Well, EldestGirl had a wonderful time. Nobody was seriously electrocuted, and if I had one piece of advice, it would be try not to combine a chocolate fountain, a bunch of 6 year olds and white linen curtains.
We’re going back to soft play next year.